Penguin

Haiku, Haiku-a!
No haiku for you today.
Maybe tomorrow.

Two in the morning,
I have ordered some cheese puffs.
They will not arrive.

No more Web Twinkies.
Must leave basement to get more.
My world is ending.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent and reboot.
Order shall return.

A file that big?
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

Internet keyboard
call your host to configure.
Sorry, no clue here.

"Hey! What's going on?"
"The internet is broken."
"Oh, I'll try later."

My mail box is full.
Seven megs of porn it seems.
How did that get there?

How do you check mail?
"Same way I always do it."
And that helps me how?

"Can connect, can't browse?
Sounds like TCP-IP"
"Can't be. Just killed it."

A Virus Scanner?
Of course I have one of those.
No, wait... that's just DOS.

Dials, gets no answer.
Also, her second line rings.
A coincedence?

Installed new modem,
now has to call Microsoft.
God damn you, XP!

Account and password...
Those seem perfectly fine here.
Our server just hates you.

14.4 modem
my connection is too slow
it must be your fault

"My web page is down,
What is your excuse this time!?"
You're an idiot.

Hard drive getting full.
All your space are belong to
Quake 3. What you say!

Help! Banzai Buddy!
Monkey won't leave me alone!
Pardon, while I laugh.

circular error
GPF warning software
has a GPF

System settings changed.
Pick a Blue Screen Of Death cause.
You must choose wisely.

Nimda virus strikes.
Wipes out half of mail server.
Weep for your lost porn.

Frontpage, Dreamweaver.
A web tech craves not these things.
Just view the source, Luke.

I wish I could say
"I can't be clearer without
patronizing you."

Can you please explain,
what does SMTP mean?
Send Me Tons of Porn.

Wipe cache, history.
But work's proxy server files
Nail me for goat porn.

Surfing porn at work.
Hear supervisor's footsteps.
Quickly minimize.

Ruthlessly pillaged
from here. zcat(1) thinks this
link should be haiku.

also see this page
a lengthy piece of haiku
which decrypts movies.


Aborted effort.
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.

I feel so tired,
very little sleep last night
but I can wiki

as long as I wear
my glasses to rest my eyes
otherwise they hurt.


Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.

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  • IanWehrman
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