| Rev | Author | # | Line |
|---|---|---|---|
| 5 | zcat(1) | 1 | Haiku, Haiku-a!%%% |
| 2 | No haiku for you today.%%% | ||
| 3 | Maybe tomorrow. | ||
| 4 | |||
| 5 | Two in the morning,%%% | ||
| 6 | I have ordered some cheese puffs.%%% | ||
| 7 | They will not arrive. | ||
| 8 | |||
| 9 | No more Web Twinkies.%%% | ||
| 10 | Must leave basement to get more.%%% | ||
| 11 | My world is ending. | ||
| 12 | |||
| 13 | Chaos reigns within.%%% | ||
| 14 | Reflect, repent and reboot.%%% | ||
| 15 | Order shall return. | ||
| 16 | |||
| 17 | A file that big?%%% | ||
| 18 | It might be very useful.%%% | ||
| 19 | But now it is gone. | ||
| 20 | |||
| 21 | Internet keyboard%%% | ||
| 22 | call your host to configure.%%% | ||
| 23 | Sorry, no clue here. | ||
| 24 | |||
| 25 | "Hey! What's going on?"%%% | ||
| 26 | "The internet is broken."%%% | ||
| 27 | "Oh, I'll try later." | ||
| 28 | |||
| 29 | My mail box is full.%%% | ||
| 30 | Seven megs of porn it seems.%%% | ||
| 31 | How did that get there? | ||
| 32 | |||
| 33 | How do you check mail?%%% | ||
| 34 | "Same way I always do it."%%% | ||
| 35 | And that helps me how? | ||
| 36 | |||
| 37 | "Can connect, can't browse?%%% | ||
| 38 | Sounds like TCP-IP"%%% | ||
| 39 | "Can't be. Just killed it." | ||
| 40 | |||
| 41 | A Virus Scanner?%%% | ||
| 42 | Of course I have one of those.%%% | ||
| 43 | No, wait... that's just DOS. | ||
| 44 | |||
| 45 | Dials, gets no answer.%%% | ||
| 46 | Also, her second line rings.%%% | ||
| 47 | A coincedence? | ||
| 48 | |||
| 49 | Installed new modem,%%% | ||
| 50 | now has to call Microsoft.%%% | ||
| 51 | God damn you, XP! | ||
| 52 | |||
| 53 | Account and password...%%% | ||
| 54 | Those seem perfectly fine here.%%% | ||
| 55 | Our server just hates you. | ||
| 56 | |||
| 57 | 14.4 modem%%% | ||
| 58 | my connection is too slow%%% | ||
| 59 | it must be your fault | ||
| 60 | |||
| 61 | "My web page is down,%%% | ||
| 62 | What is your excuse this time!?"%%% | ||
| 63 | You're an idiot. | ||
| 64 | |||
| 65 | Hard drive getting full.%%% | ||
| 66 | All your space are belong to%%% | ||
| 67 | Quake 3. What you say! | ||
| 68 | |||
| 69 | Help! Banzai Buddy!%%% | ||
| 70 | Monkey won't leave me alone!%%% | ||
| 71 | Pardon, while I laugh. | ||
| 72 | |||
| 73 | circular error%%% | ||
| 74 | GPF warning software%%% | ||
| 75 | has a GPF | ||
| 76 | |||
| 77 | System settings changed.%%% | ||
| 78 | Pick a Blue Screen Of Death cause.%%% | ||
| 79 | You must choose wisely. | ||
| 80 | |||
| 81 | Nimda virus strikes.%%% | ||
| 82 | Wipes out half of mail server.%%% | ||
| 83 | Weep for your lost porn. | ||
| 84 | |||
| 85 | Frontpage, Dreamweaver.%%% | ||
| 86 | A web tech craves not these things.%%% | ||
| 87 | Just view the source, Luke. | ||
| 88 | |||
| 89 | I wish I could say%%% | ||
| 90 | "I can't be clearer without%%% | ||
| 91 | patronizing you." | ||
| 92 | |||
| 93 | Can you please explain,%%% | ||
| 94 | what does SMTP mean?%%% | ||
| 95 | Send Me Tons of Porn. | ||
| 96 | |||
| 97 | Wipe cache, history.%%% | ||
| 98 | But work's proxy server files%%% | ||
| 99 | Nail me for goat porn. | ||
| 100 | |||
| 101 | Surfing porn at work.%%% | ||
| 102 | Hear supervisor's footsteps.%%% | ||
| 103 | Quickly minimize. | ||
| 104 | |||
| 105 | Ruthlessly pillaged %%% | ||
| 106 | from [here|http://www.lanset.com/troy/techhaiku.html]. zcat(1) thinks this%%% | ||
| 107 | link should be haiku. | ||
| 108 | |||
| 109 | also see [this|http://www-2.cs.cmu.edu/~dst/DeCSS/Gallery/decss-haiku.txt] page %%% | ||
| 110 | a lengthy piece of haiku %%% | ||
| 111 | which decrypts movies. | ||
| 112 | |||
| 113 | |||
| 114 | ---- | ||
| 115 | ''Aborted effort.%%% | ||
| 116 | Close all that you have worked on.%%% | ||
| 117 | You ask far too much.'' | ||
| 118 | |||
| 119 | I feel so tired, %%% | ||
| 120 | very little sleep last night %%% | ||
| 121 | but I can wiki | ||
| 122 | |||
| 123 | as long as I wear %%% | ||
| 124 | my glasses to rest my eyes %%% | ||
| 125 | otherwise they hurt. | ||
| 6 | IanWehrman | 126 | |
| 127 | ---- | ||
| 128 | Stay the patient course.%%% | ||
| 129 | Of little worth is your ire.%%% | ||
| 130 | The network is down. |
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